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When parents defend their children's bad behaviors

When parents defend their children's bad behaviors


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When our children start school or nursery school they have to face alone the problems that may arise with friends or colleagues. Until then they had played with other children under the supervision of their parents, who were there to help them in case of conflict.

From my own experience, in all schools and in all classes there is a boy or a girl who has a more aggressive behavior than the rest. Parents usually comment in small groups how badly the boy or girl in question behaves, they talk to their children so that they do not play with them, they discuss the matter with the teachers and ask them for more vigilance and, when the matter has been done unsustainable, they talk to the child's parents. But, What happens when those parents defend the wrongdoings of their children?

I have attended several such cases and the attitude of the parents of the bully child used to be the same: to excuse the wrongdoings of their children. I have heard a phrase like: 'he reacted like that because they didn't want to play with him', 'he hit them because they laughed', 'because they didn't give him the ball' ... There is always a reason for misbehavior and never forgiveness towards the attacked child. And even in some cases, I have listened indignantly how parents turned the aggressor into a victim.

I guess that's how sometimes some children engage in bullying behavior towards other children, no one has set limits for them and they find the support of their parents, who downplay their children's actions because they are childish, or cover them up.

What can we do in those cases in which we do not find the support of the parents of the aggressors?

- It is important to complain to the school and ask for extreme vigilance and behavior of the child.

- Talk to our children and give them weapons to be able to fight against bullying. Violence is not the answer, we must teach them to show a firm attitude and to respond verbally with firmness and security so that they can dismount the harasser.

- If the school does not address complaints from parents about a child's behavior, nor does the child's parents help to eradicate that behavior, it may be time to make a formal complaint either to the study department or to the court. with a lawyer.

And, as a final point, something my mother did when there were other times and my brother was little. Another boy four years older than him was bullying him and my mother went straight to the boy and made a few 'threats' at him. It never bothered him again. Nowadays this is very politically incorrect, but sometimes you feel like it, right?

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